This issue starts with Guy Smith reflecting on the team’s adventure while playing Russian Roulette out of guilt. We learn that part of his abilities–and the basis for his codename (“Mister Sensitive”)–is the ability to feel vibrations in the air. We also learn that Professor X gave him a special suit that stops his powers from driving him crazy. Although not well enough, since he’s playing Russian Roulette.
Apparently, Doop is the team videographer and he filmed their last adventure–where many of them were killed. The team review the tape, and U-Go-Girl says she wants to be team leader.
But Anarchist objects.
They learn that their team has been sold to a 34-year-old trilliionaire who has filled their ranks with new members.
Bloke, is big and strong and can change the color of his skin to match his surroundings. He’s also gay.
Was that the first gay kiss in comics?
Vivisector is a werewolf.
Phat is gangbanging trailer trash who can grow his body parts.
Saint Anna is a telekinetic healer. And then there’s the guy we saw on page one of this comic…
…Guy Smith, Mister Sensitive, who is also an orphan rescued by Professor X. Guy doesn’t like his codename, and soon adopts the name Orphan instead.
Talk about a diverse book!
When the team goes to publicly announce their new members, the real X-Force shows up.
After a brief fight (as readers, we don’t get to see how it ends), Coach announces that Orphan is the new team leader and sends the team on their next mission, which is to save a kid in a foreign country. Note that the fight with X-Force may be slightly gratuitous (although I think it helps us as readers relate to a very odd comic), but this battle over the team’s name will lead to this series ending soon and the new team being rebranded as X-Statix.
Without getting into all the details of it, they end up fighting the army of a small country, Bloke dies, Saint Anna dies…
…and we learn that Coach wanted to save the kid just to exploit him. Orphan says he won’t sign on for that and protects the kid from Coach, which leads Coach to offer U-Go-Girl the leadership job if she’ll just kill Orphan.
This comic is bananas. B-A-N-A-N-A-S.